I cant apply at UC. I dont have a 3.0 GPA.

I took the ACT 2 days ago. Everything went wrong. Very wrong.

Ive been watching Dragon Ball Z religiously. Goku keeps stumping the plots with his insanely huge energy levels. Its drying out the show, gahhh!!!

Im losing inspiration to draw. I mean, I still do. I just feel like... Ill never be where I want to be. And all these miracle 'about me's' for amazing artists start out with, "I started drawing when I was 5 and won a really big super important contest when I was 10 ecause I was sooooo gooood."

And Im 17. And I didnt even pick up on things til a few years ago. AAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH



Im really beginning to despise my environment. People are dispondent and selfish. I wish I could be as righteous as I want to be, but Im not. I forget the importance of being a good person, and I let all the pitiful anxieties of today get to me. Give a lot of yourself to people and it will come back tenfold, I used to say. I havent read the scriptures in two weeks... I feel de-inspiration-ated. You know, I always have these dumb speels where I whine like a baby about  my life and its all centered around not reading the scriptures. Everytime I put it down for a few weeks, everything gets darker, and I start feeling like a worthless piece of scum. Everything goes out of whack when I ignore Heavenly Father.

I should be a little more respectful. He's done so much for me so far, I cant just lay it all down and pretend none of His blessings ever happened. Its just rediculous. And its hard to explain, I just cant keep up with it. I mean, I guess I could if I wanted to, Im just lazy. Its awful. Blahhfsafdklasdfsl. I need spiritual strength more than anything in times like these. I shouldnt be making things so hard on myself like this.

bfdsafkl sajkfld safsajk dfdsafdsa

Kids and oiji boards. Its like some sick influenza. I would never put my spirit at risk like that. Thats inviting evil energy to come to you.

Man, I sound like some supersitious wizard. lol
end transmission.

         Im probably going to start using this journal to post links to art pages and stuff. Im pretty fond of science fiction paintings with realistic figures. For some reason, anatomical stuff impresses me. (probably since Ive been trying to learn it so hard and cant!) I also pop art type things. Thats usually what I try to go for in my own personal illustrations.

More of his work is featured in his BLOG:
http://nachomolinablog.blogspot.com/

end transmission.

                    Im sorry journal for neglecting you. Ive just been so busy with so much crap! Ill sum it up for you

- Im not going to apply to calarts. Im looking to apply at UC and CCAD, and THEN go to Calarts. If all that calarts stuff doesnt work out for me, atleast I can say I have a bachelors degree in something and fall back on it. UC's portfolio deadline is MID NOVEMBER. And now its MID OCTOBER. AGGHH

- I got a refurbished zune for my other one. Upgraded to a 120 gig, and you can guess Ive been swimming in loads of music again. (and watching DBZ!!)

- Homework sucks. So uh, Ive been trying to do it. Im struggling really bad in math right now. Really. Really bad. I need to stop sitting by Melissa and Scotty lol

- Im back to the scriptures again. I havent read them the last couple days, but Im getting more and more informed about things. I feel a bit wiser, but I certainly have a lot more to go. Im glad the holy spirit hasnt left me..

- BABYSITTING. I hate it. Deetra's having Jenni's baby today, Lila, so thats another kid to the list.


Thats about it. When something new happens, Ill try to remember to write it in my long forgotten livejournal. lol.

end transmission.

p.s.
Oh yeah! Chris has custody of Noah now! So now Mary gets him on the weekends and on Tuesdays. They flip flopped it. But Chris's lawyer is trying to get her to pay child support, but she has 2 other kids to support.. I think thats really stupid. He doesnt need her to pay child support.